One of My Coworkers Threw Me Under the Bus

Your Corporate Black Girl

Dear Nikki,

I’ve been in my position for almost a year and have always felt like I was trying to make myself fit in. I also noticed issues I experienced in my past position at a different company that I ultimately allowed to go on too long and it became a toxic environment. 

Now, a mistake that’s partially my fault and I’ve accepted responsibility for, has been proved to be an entire team issue. One of my coworkers threw me under the bus to our boss, feigned innocence and then admitted later to me and another coworker that she had a part to play in the mistake as well. 

I had been looking at applying to other jobs but still wanted to make this work but now I feel like I need to remove myself as soon as possible. I don’t want to be a part of team that functions in dysfunction and talks about communication and accountability and then places the blame on solely one person. 

My question is should I have a conversation with my boss about my coworker’s behavior and should I have a talk with my coworker? Also, is it really time for me to leave or do I use this as an opportunity to rise above?


Florida, USA


Stop running.  

You need to have a conversation with your boss about the general situation and clear your name.
Don't concern yourself with defaming anyone else because it's just going to look like "she said / she said" and you don't want to be looped into furthering the mess.

Also, I think you need to focus on making the right fit for the job and not making friends at work. Your job is not the foundation for your friendships, unless you eventually gain friends over time but it's not the place to seek making friendships. That's not what you're there for. Focus on your purpose for being there. Those that are like minded will eventually surround themselves with you, but you need to redirect your focus first

Good luck!

Nikki Davis

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Your curly girl manager, just trying to live her happiest life! 

Wife, new mom, member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. with 11 years industry experience, 6 years of management experience. Manager a team of men in a male dominant industry, while being the only woman on the team. DIY fashion blogger, a self taught seamstress. Owner/Creator of a monthly subscription service,

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