My Manager Harasses Me Through Skype Following Me Around the Office from Break Rooms to Restrooms

Your Corporate Black Girl

Dear Nikki,

I have been consistently discriminated against and harassed at this job and bullied by my management and HR. Ever since I went to HR about my white male manager making jokes about “growing up racist ” and “not being able to talk to black people,” he has been going to other coworkers telling them that I’m “Angry.”

He continually harasses me through Skype, following me around the office from break rooms, to restrooms even downstairs out the building. He even leaves notes at my desk. I had to stop signing into my skype because that’s how he could see when I was away from my desk.

When I sat at my desk I would sit as low as possible because he would stare at me, he then came over to my desk and told me “I can’t see you when you sit low, you need to sit up.” He put in over 20 tickets to fix my Skype to come on automatically. But yet, says he’s not worried about me. I have been at my desk numerous times, and he would walk past and bend over to look at my legs under the desk to see what I have on.

Every time I have told about this matter, I have been retaliated against. Either verbal warning or actual write ups. THIS IS MY LAST WRITE UP AND I WILL BE FIRED. Today, I was called into a meeting and was told I'm being written up because of a WHITE MALE. Who expressed to me early December that he will not go into a closed room with me “for fear of me accusing him of harassment” he also said “He heard about me” which meant my WHITE MALE manager told him about my harassment claims against him. I took offense to what was said to me and expressed that I felt discriminated against because I am a Black woman.

Fast forward to last week; the same man was in a room that I needed to go in. Since he expressed he didn’t want to be in a room with me with the door closed, I waited outside until another person walked into the room. A “White male who is a GM” I then realized that the door was propped open so I could go in. I then said to myself “Oh I can go in the door open” I forgot it was okay to be in the same room if the door was open. TODAY they wrote me up for just that. Because I said “Oh the door open” I feel like I’m being discriminated against and bullied because they continuously try to peg out that I’m an angry black woman me and other black on our team has gone through the same even worse.

I am a black woman that’s trying to further my career. I like my job and am very good at it. But I have been met with constant disrespect and unwillingness to train me. I’ve also asked and applied for other positions in the company, and they have denied me even after my claims of being uncomfortable and bullied by management. MIND YOU nothing was done to the White man that said them rude things to me prior. But they are writing me up because he expressed I hurt his feelings by saying the door was open.


Dallas, Texas, USA


I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this and have been going through this for quite some time. 

I would first suggest compiling any and all physical evidence, i.e. emails, printouts of your Skype conversations, write-ups and warnings, communications with others/witnesses that you already have etc. Since your HR group is not cooperating, it's time to move on.

It's time that you look for another job and I would also suggest reaching out to the EEOC Office in your area.  You will have 365 days from the date you leave this company to open a claim with the EEOC. They will investigate your claim for free, I believe, and if you win you won't have to pay like you would for an attorney to represent you. 

If you don't mind spending the money, then get yourself an attorney, especially if you know you have a case. If you think you don't have your stuff in order and you're not sure if you can prove this with an investigation, then I would go to the EEOC.

You need to be able to work, without the fear of being discriminated against, whether it's racially motivated or sexism.
You have rights. 

I do think it's in your best interest, however, to get yourself out of there and into a better working environment. This, along with whether you decide to report this company and its employees, is all within your control. 
Take control of this situation and don't allow them to continue to tell you what they're going to do. You can choose to take matters into your own hands and fight back. You've tried to handle it within the four walls of the company, and they're not properly protecting you, so it's time to go elsewhere. And... just because you leave doesn't mean the fight for justice needs to end. You'll be helping those that come after you and those that are still there if you choose to get this investigated by outside sources. 
Keep your head up. 

God speed,

Nikki Davis 

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Your curly girl manager, just trying to live her happiest life! 

Wife, new mom, member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. with 11 years industry experience, 6 years of management experience. Manager a team of men in a male dominant industry, while being the only woman on the team. DIY fashion blogger, a self taught seamstress. Owner/Creator of a monthly subscription service,

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