My Coworker Has Completely Stopped Communication with Me for No Reason
Nikki,
What are some suggested strategies to improve the office atmosphere with a coworker who has completely stopped communication without reason?
-Mid-Level in Cleveland, OH
Dear Positive Vibes Only,
I could be wrong but it sounds like you value the relationship with this coworker.
This matters to you because you care about the relationship/rapport that you have with this coworker. If this was a relationship that was simply a coworker, I don't think you'd need to concern yourself so much with how to help the atmosphere.
I think it's important to attack this situation by first understanding your feelings about what's happened. Now that you know you value the relationship or friendship you have, treat this coworker like someone that you value.
What would you do if a friend "ghosted" you? I'm sure you'd want to pull them to the side and ask them if everything is ok. Because this is a work environment, I'd keep your attempts to find out what's wrong to a professional minimum. Don't come off too strong but be concerned. If you still get the cold shoulder, then remain cordial but move on. I think sometimes people need to be reminded that it's them that's holding on to their own hurt and if after you've shown compassion and tried to get to the bottom of their issues and they still don't budge, moving on can be what they need to see that maybe they need to move on too.
Now, I could totally be off base here and this not be a person that you've bonded with. If that's the case and your true concern is the overall atmosphere... depending on who this person is within the team, you can either ignore and keep on, keepin' on or you can still use the same method mentioned above.
There's no harm in trying to address the behavior and helping them move forward. The key, in either case is to move forward. Remain positive. Address concerns as needed but keep it moving.
Like they say, "one monkey don't stop no show". If the person becomes toxic, then it may be a good idea to bring this to a manager's attention for them to address with the coworker.
This may just be a period in time for the person but once behavior becomes toxic, it's time to have behavioral conversations which has to come from the command chain and not a peer.
You can only do what you can do. The coworker will hopefully, eventually come back around.
Good luck!
Nikki Davis
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NIKKI
Your curly girl manager, just trying to live her happiest life!
Wife, new mom, member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. with 11 years industry experience, 6 years of management experience. Manager a team of men in a male dominant industry, while being the only woman on the team. DIY fashion blogger, a self taught seamstress. Owner/Creator of a monthly subscription service, SewConscious.com.
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